Friday, March 29, 2013

"They hate it when you SURVIVE through the bull......"

it has been a long time since i have written.
for many reasons
there has been a technology poltergeist about me for months, if not years. having destroyed three laptops? since 2010, and new machines since december 2012. it is phenomenal. at one point i wondered if it was one of the aftereffects, costs and result of being intergalactic...pulling energy from machines to stay alive, especially when the blood of the human fragile is not enough...

but i decide i would write/copy/share this entry just as i wrote these words:
"we dont know what this is, but perhaps it ist he morrocoy buried and recoiled in reflection...you know they are the earth's totem... and so as Jp writes, it has been and was a heavy "messy" Thursday before Easter....but it is because Ishtar is walking about under her full moon of closures and completions of understanding all things that passeth"

and it was in response to posting this doodle from my lovely fb artist friend, Jp Parsons, whose daily doodle I reproduce to my page every day...



for it, she wrote: "Thursday before Easter has always been heavy on my heart.."
and so it was, this Thursday, yesterday, was "messy" challenging, deeply angering, painful and sad for me and my counterpart in separate incidents as if on clockwork and staging. The level of alter reality synchronicity, evolving, evolution, instruction, seering, messaging and revelation and epiphanies we have had since Feb 10, 2013 have been unbelievable. He designated to me to write them all down, all our thoughts and experiences, utterings after we realized the bubbling fount that is us when we get together. and so seeing this doodle and its words, i add it to my writing/muse/revelation that i had this morning..so beset have i been, i had been deep inside myself all day Thursday pondering the Bs in our life -- Barataria, Bon Air, Baptistes and it will be interesting to find out missy's maiden...anyway...here it is...
__________________

been bewailing matters
asking 'why me'
'what i do these people'

but as i pondered mutual situations in double households and what is at stake, on the table, at risk; and most importantly, when i look at how things are panning, shifting, setting, domino falling, and the position of all things, and how fast things are occurring as if we are light beings here on earth. three years passed already in three months...the beach lime in particular, tells me...i was called, designated and sent. i am chosen and the chosen one and that, therein, ergo, the hate.

connectedly, the reality just hit me, i am being pushed and goaded to make a play that sets their hand. and i just realized it is not for me to do that. and as i ponder i see all the signs and messages that have wandered to me in the  last few days and weeks...being told by counterpart: "it is what it is supposed to be" and "everybody have to do what they have to do" (we all play our roles, even if you came to be an ugly, crass, graciousless person after faking and frauding as nice all your life- we all come to do what we were sent to do! damn all those who are offended) I tell you if we can understand these tidbits now as humans, our life will seriously bloom...this is the real toolkit of how to become zen the buddha (my saying).

So no matter what folks do or how they play...things are the way they are. and how are they? i was chosen. I was selected. by whom i have no answers: ancestors, parents, planets, my origins, my obe, my past lives, my karma, the universe, mother earth-gaia-being one of her such as myself...and the ultimate messages of my beingness that have come to me: "the mother of the stars" said by that blind seerman two years ago/ and one now who thinks i am the "one waited for-Empress Royalty" i giggle every time. but marvel when folk reach for evidence like the BK server agreeing with the most serious of faces, no joke "doh mind her, she from another planet". i know she said

wow.
"dont let them steal your joy" for that is surely the most basic purpose they came for
they were made for this: scowls, out of timing tongues, dark eyes, cleft mouths with false teeths. beware of those with false teeth. I saying so today. i will learn if that is just gibberish>

and that is the point...the gibberish...i am learning all that i have marched, lived and espoused, thinking it was gibberish, was all for a purpose, my attainment and elevation. It is what i was made strong for, perhaps.

and so much to say...was recounting to list all the things I help and solved for a special someone in the last few months. him telling me for those gifts, "my way is paid for by him" amazing eh, but i always took it as par for course, nothing special, and he always telling me i downplay myself. ,..me who everyone thinks is so arrogant. but i am learning how people see and what they think of you is blood of their issues, nothing to do with you...so this Full Friday morning, seems as if everything is falling into place. Goddess Ishtar Easter was and has been with me afterall. This Full Completion Moon, that ends all things once and for all, is ending my strife and beat up. Let me be more silent and unmoving..my eruptions can be permitted. I am in the fire with the greatest of demons and beasts ...their moves intentions, actions and motivations warrant such ...guess it is good he is a bush fireman of controlled blazes.

fire woman for bush fireman.
and do we need to start listing all the commonalities.

it is amazing. I wish i could tell you. and believe me, all that i wrote above, I did not
when things are aligned and planets designate it so, for ages and aeons before your time on earth, tell me what farthling of a speck of inconsequential human can do to alter it.

And (leaning in as he does)...that is why they hate you. Ultimate Woman.
Su Ming once benedicted me Universal

And so it is. I write for your knowing too

Bless Lovely You
Fight nothing and no one
Resist no tide nor flow


=-------------------------------

and as i go foraging for a pic of Ishtar and mentioning of this March 27 Full Moon, I stumble upon what i wrote yesterday, twenty one hours ago: "They hate it when you SURVIVE through the bull......"
So what i just wrote is the fulmination, completion and outpouring of what i knew in my heart...coming to the fore for the purpose and upliftment of someone else. I knew it all along. Arent all our experiences to remind us of what we knew, but lost and forgot, travelling back here?

and that also gives me the title to this piece...


two days ago too...counterpart casually said to me, "you just dont let go" do you...and i agreed it was a mission. Precursor again, which is also past and prologue. So the larger charge here is for me to let go. I am not moving. I stand. Still. But I let go. I release all the negativity and residue folk leave with you when you ponder, integrate or try to make sense of the ill that is their life designate and mission.


"within all her combined aspects, Ishtar promotes the concept of Divine Discernment"
Source: http://www.pyramidcompany.com/CJT/index_Page3983.htm

Jp Parsons, the artist of the doodle above, the first art appearing writes this to me in afterthought:

Jp Parsons The words are from the sun Maven Huggins- you are working beside me- weaving light. Light is glass to me - transparent tangible truth that God exist. You reach unto the sun and give me words which manifest into art... They drip like honey that Natalisa Robish-Strickland has made from my home-- my beach of love where I kisses and became the mother of David Parsons and Margaret Parsons... The sands of my past melting into nothingness - which is everything. This weekend- this rebirth of the spirit is not lost upon me.
I weep, sad for my lost past.. Sad for my babies... They are standing in their thresholds beside me... Wanting to fly.

Fly beside me, I whisper
Never ever give up
You are meant for greatness!
You are made of the same
The sun- the son
To walk beside you
Along the beach
Is all I desire.
I love- I am.


~

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