Predestined

part three

i see clearly i have been greatly rich in past lives, ancient and past lives. i think i may have been obscenely rich like these syrians here...onto ten and more generations. i have had lives for longer than that. and being ancient besides. yes i repeated myself there twice, but still trying to convey different dimensions to the same existence...so to have lived so long and to remain in the same cart so to speak...living, inhabiting, being and appearing rich to so many, all and sundry...even as I am sans so much if not almost all material gifts, for me to remain rich under those circumstances, today, makes me think i had to be obscenely rich previously. It is a range of things...the impossibility to get at humility,and a humble inhabitedness and visage that many remark about, even and especially given my apparently broken circumstance. who does that. it is like kunta kinte who never gives in no matter how stripped of flesh, bloodied and bones broken, he shall never change his name. it is the inability and absent the form to be any kind of employee. it took me years to recognize that, but i have always had a problem being an employee. likewise, i recognize to be a good employee requires some serious slave protocols that i seem to be completely missing. it is like the modern day pieces dont add up until you go back to some unknown herhistory or story.

so. to be reaping rewards of being housed, fed, shelthered and cared for/ for free
speaks to some neverending well, chasm or universe of good will carrying my soul.
to have nothing and still find the required something to clear a family debt to gift them land in this twentyfirst century 2013, means i have unending riches still trailing. there was so much at one time, that through time, dimensions, worlds, universes, cultures and cosmos, and still have when i cant pull two coins together. well. chippy has said everything is laid right there at my feet. the odd things people say to me, over time come to have meaning. i await though to understand what it was gita said to me at my door a few months ago. but i remember the blind seer, when he told me i was the mother of the stars. if that were true then such a person will always have stars at her hands to make rich all those about her wouldnt she? even as she tarried naked and without abilities and implements. not this world but the before and the next. not what is seen but what is unsseen. and is dat <3 br="">
that heart that is gullible, well intentioned, full.  the cost of all that fullness has to be the scrapes the sullying the robbery, even every now and then