tianjin
real apocalypse
/ no filmovie
port container stacks are scattered egos
what happened there
on the ongoing reprogramming the subconscious mind:
it came to me while sleeping: no feelings. no emotions,
no sentiment. get out of yourself, your head and your feelings
if not your life
then it just hit me an experience i had months ago around my birthday, only now i solve. no matter how people pretend to be mature and different, they are not. and when you think it is safe to talk to men, it is not. they gossip more than women it seems. anything innocuous is made into a bacchanal.
then it hits me too about people. they real have no shame or limits. someone who says they dont come to my door and gate to collect me to lime, came yesterday to ask me to come help her prepare for a birthday celebration tomorrow. i see in her kitchen sink a huge mass, the size of a kilm tin of chicken skin and fat, frozen to death. she says it is neck, and my stomach held. for if i thought further i would have gotten sick. first of all yesterday i thought, who would buy that?, and so? half of the price you just paid is going to be thrown away, probably more than half. I would love to know how that is sold: by weight or bag. and then weigh it after it is cleaned. but she let slip out that i was coming to help her clean that. and if a scene was playing out in my mind it would have shown me stopping in my tracks and staring at the audience dry face. she really look at me and make me out to be the one to come and clean chicken necks? you compliment me on knowing about a kitchen a week ago so you can prep to ask me to come help you strip massive chicken skin and fat? what about me so appears? and i think either i dont see myself or people are real on their own shtick. but i wake up now having supposed to be there an hour and twenty minutes ago, and realize I am not going, and if i do it will be in the afternoon.and i am certainly not cleaning any chicken. i wake up with a revelation: dont buy anything you dont want to clean, and better than that, be mindful of the shit you buy. that bag looked like proper elements for dog food. and i hate to sound elitist but this is about economics too, wasting money for what will be thrown away. but i wonder, for they do have dogs, if they will save that for the dogs, but I know that is not good for the dogs. the skin maybe but not all that fat. i swear if i go near there I may not eat anything else prepared at all.
a small interaction that gave me so much. people will use you if you let them. you will get played if you not awake
real apocalypse
/ no filmovie
port container stacks are scattered egos
what happened there
on the ongoing reprogramming the subconscious mind:
it came to me while sleeping: no feelings. no emotions,
no sentiment. get out of yourself, your head and your feelings
if not your life
then it just hit me an experience i had months ago around my birthday, only now i solve. no matter how people pretend to be mature and different, they are not. and when you think it is safe to talk to men, it is not. they gossip more than women it seems. anything innocuous is made into a bacchanal.
then it hits me too about people. they real have no shame or limits. someone who says they dont come to my door and gate to collect me to lime, came yesterday to ask me to come help her prepare for a birthday celebration tomorrow. i see in her kitchen sink a huge mass, the size of a kilm tin of chicken skin and fat, frozen to death. she says it is neck, and my stomach held. for if i thought further i would have gotten sick. first of all yesterday i thought, who would buy that?, and so? half of the price you just paid is going to be thrown away, probably more than half. I would love to know how that is sold: by weight or bag. and then weigh it after it is cleaned. but she let slip out that i was coming to help her clean that. and if a scene was playing out in my mind it would have shown me stopping in my tracks and staring at the audience dry face. she really look at me and make me out to be the one to come and clean chicken necks? you compliment me on knowing about a kitchen a week ago so you can prep to ask me to come help you strip massive chicken skin and fat? what about me so appears? and i think either i dont see myself or people are real on their own shtick. but i wake up now having supposed to be there an hour and twenty minutes ago, and realize I am not going, and if i do it will be in the afternoon.and i am certainly not cleaning any chicken. i wake up with a revelation: dont buy anything you dont want to clean, and better than that, be mindful of the shit you buy. that bag looked like proper elements for dog food. and i hate to sound elitist but this is about economics too, wasting money for what will be thrown away. but i wonder, for they do have dogs, if they will save that for the dogs, but I know that is not good for the dogs. the skin maybe but not all that fat. i swear if i go near there I may not eat anything else prepared at all.
a small interaction that gave me so much. people will use you if you let them. you will get played if you not awake
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