the lack of understanding between beings
it is a phenomenal thing; understanding
the ability to speak to others, to explain a thing, an idea, a requirement a consequence. maybe that a pawpaw needs to stay on its tree for it to get full and then proceed to the stages of ripening. the idea akin would be a baby...we do not want them premature. we do not remove, pick or take them from the womb before they are fully formed. same and so much so fruit. otherwise they are not viable, or may proceed to some stage or state that is like bitterness, gall to the mouth, fruit of neither juice, flesh or nourishment. what is so hard about that
even if someone is so unaligned away from nature to understand if it appears that a tree is dying, as long as it is not poisoned or afflicted, it is best for that green fruit to go down fallen with the tree than to be picked and removed from its sustenance/
so a pick was attempted about two weeks ago. i explained myself. i explained it was too green. not ripe. i get up this morning and what to call such people, i said inhuman cause to me it boggles to try to communicate with someone by ideas and language and they move and behave as if an exchange did not take place, as if common sense was not intrinsic, inherent...but then i get stumped to see and be amazed that in this caribbean flourishing ecology, people really are so stupid?
i have never held a pawpaw so hard. no exaggeration it is as a rock. the other new thing i gather seeing it up close is that it is a color of deep hunter green so now i know there are stages of green even.
and when i talk about it, no one can say, or admit, the matriarch in particular that it was better not to be removed, or that it is over green. never an admittance to any misstep, faux pas or insensibility. it is an odd thing cause it is getting me to a point where a kind of indifference steps in, one sans talking, communication, ...it is destabilizing really, cause you feel crazy..you struggle to figure out, wrap your head around talking to people who supposedly can see, hear, speak, have language skills, a brain, but yet still as if none of those things exist or are in train so it silences you. what is the use. an amazing thing to live with such creatures.
see me now writing with a calm depth or attempt to reach for my own understanding..who are these people ? what is their affliction? is opposition so strong within them?
and i am trying to appoint myself to the right orientation, to the appropriate response and what level of engagement. i can neither entangle, engage or waste time processing...there is absolutely nothing to gain. i am left with how to deal with the planting and growing of food in the yard. before this this same enlightened one, despite being about me and hearing me talk organic, took it upon herself to go and purchase poison (fertilizer) to spray plants she neither planted nor tended. so quietly i am pondering is it that I am to cease this experiment of planting here. or stop using that spot just outside the kitchen window?
but i think of something related yet esoteric to explain...they wonder why i have no interest and resist any talking conversation or counsel, council with them and it is because i see you do not value what i tell you, you do not see any value in me, you deny any contribution i could or do make, so where would i come in sitting with you to bring and build what understanding...when in small matters, you cant even take heed of my voice or my aptitude. people who dont see you or deny you are not ones you are to sit with. in some quarters they would say never to sit and sup with. but thus the peculiarity that is family.
and me here with my thousand degree of emotion and thought for any thing, all things. but silent zen one day will predominate
that and taking to letters
it is a phenomenal thing; understanding
the ability to speak to others, to explain a thing, an idea, a requirement a consequence. maybe that a pawpaw needs to stay on its tree for it to get full and then proceed to the stages of ripening. the idea akin would be a baby...we do not want them premature. we do not remove, pick or take them from the womb before they are fully formed. same and so much so fruit. otherwise they are not viable, or may proceed to some stage or state that is like bitterness, gall to the mouth, fruit of neither juice, flesh or nourishment. what is so hard about that
even if someone is so unaligned away from nature to understand if it appears that a tree is dying, as long as it is not poisoned or afflicted, it is best for that green fruit to go down fallen with the tree than to be picked and removed from its sustenance/
so a pick was attempted about two weeks ago. i explained myself. i explained it was too green. not ripe. i get up this morning and what to call such people, i said inhuman cause to me it boggles to try to communicate with someone by ideas and language and they move and behave as if an exchange did not take place, as if common sense was not intrinsic, inherent...but then i get stumped to see and be amazed that in this caribbean flourishing ecology, people really are so stupid?
i have never held a pawpaw so hard. no exaggeration it is as a rock. the other new thing i gather seeing it up close is that it is a color of deep hunter green so now i know there are stages of green even.
and when i talk about it, no one can say, or admit, the matriarch in particular that it was better not to be removed, or that it is over green. never an admittance to any misstep, faux pas or insensibility. it is an odd thing cause it is getting me to a point where a kind of indifference steps in, one sans talking, communication, ...it is destabilizing really, cause you feel crazy..you struggle to figure out, wrap your head around talking to people who supposedly can see, hear, speak, have language skills, a brain, but yet still as if none of those things exist or are in train so it silences you. what is the use. an amazing thing to live with such creatures.
see me now writing with a calm depth or attempt to reach for my own understanding..who are these people ? what is their affliction? is opposition so strong within them?
and i am trying to appoint myself to the right orientation, to the appropriate response and what level of engagement. i can neither entangle, engage or waste time processing...there is absolutely nothing to gain. i am left with how to deal with the planting and growing of food in the yard. before this this same enlightened one, despite being about me and hearing me talk organic, took it upon herself to go and purchase poison (fertilizer) to spray plants she neither planted nor tended. so quietly i am pondering is it that I am to cease this experiment of planting here. or stop using that spot just outside the kitchen window?
but i think of something related yet esoteric to explain...they wonder why i have no interest and resist any talking conversation or counsel, council with them and it is because i see you do not value what i tell you, you do not see any value in me, you deny any contribution i could or do make, so where would i come in sitting with you to bring and build what understanding...when in small matters, you cant even take heed of my voice or my aptitude. people who dont see you or deny you are not ones you are to sit with. in some quarters they would say never to sit and sup with. but thus the peculiarity that is family.
and me here with my thousand degree of emotion and thought for any thing, all things. but silent zen one day will predominate
that and taking to letters
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